Four years ago today my mother passed away. It wasn’t sudden but then it was. You may wonder what I mean.
My mother was 75. She had been fighting cancer for 15 years. There were so many times in those 15 years that I thought she was going to die so when it did finally happen it was a shock. But in another way, it was such a relief. I knew her quality of life was deteriorating and it was so hard watching her try to fight her battle with the dreaded disease “cancer”.
I know she is in a much better place and is completely healed. But it doesn’t make missing her, especially during the holidays, easier.
My mother went all out during the Holidays. One year, when I was a little girl my mother decided she wanted a red and white gingham Christmas tree. She made so many gingham ornaments and bows and then made the two of us matching skirts. She always went overboard on presents for me and my brothers especially when we still believed in “Santa”.
If this is your first Holiday season without someone special in your life, I am so sorry. The best advice I can give you is to let yourself grieve and remember the great times together.
I wanted to share with you what I said at my mother’s funeral.
Mom, Mother, Nana, Candy, Myrtle (her least favorite)
Loving, Graceful, Beautiful, Charming all of the words that describe my mother
What my mother taught me!
My mother taught me to love Jesus and God with all of my heart and turn to Him first and above all for guidance and support.
My mother taught me to be a mother to love and cherish my children.
My mother taught me to be strong. If I believe in it, do it, fight for it if I have to.
My mother taught me that I can do anything if I want it bad enough.
My mother taught me how to be a wife. (Although I have not always done as she taught)
My mother told me that it is okay to dance if I want to and be enthusiastic about life. She said to live passionately.
The things my mother and I shared.
Our smile – so many people have told me over the years that we share the same smile. My son, C.J., shares it with us.
Our love for music and musicals!! We had our special songs that we shared and we sang together. I thought about singing one of them but my brother, Mike said he would get up and dance to it if I did and you do not want to see that.
Our faith- She told me about Jesus when I was just a little girl and we continued to talk and share our faith and beliefs up until the end. I know where she is and she is happy!
Our hands – every time I look at my hands I see my mother – thank you, God!
Our love for our family – Family was so important to my mother. She loved me and my brothers so much sometimes it was almost embarrassing the way she would talk about us to other people. I am sure my boys feel the same way.
What she would want me to tell you! Jesus is REAL! Jesus is the Son of God and He died for our sins. He loves you unconditionally. He is her Savior and He can be your Savior too.
